WHAT TO SAY WHEN YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT TO SAY

Having a conversation is something that every living human must do during the course of living. No man can stay without having a conversation with the next man throughout his life. And sometimes, during very sensitive conversations- like conversations with suicidal people or people going through tough times, we run out of things to say and the atmosphere becomes very awkward. How does one deal with that so as not to end up saying the wrong thing? How does one scale through such a situation? What does one say to salvage such a situation and take away the awkwardness? Not to worry, we’ve got you covered. Today, we’ll be telling you things you can say when you find yourself in such a situation.

1. Use open questions
Open questions are questions that do not give room for a yes or no answer. They give people to say more. So when next you’re struggling with what to say, try asking them an open question for them to reveal how they feel. Questions like, “What’s going on for you at the moment?”How are you feeling?” usually help to salvage certain situations when you run out of things to say. It also shows that you care about the person. This style of saving a conversation is not guaranteed to work every time too.

2. Summarize and repeat what the person is saying
It is usually best to let someone know that you really have been paying attention all he has been saying because it goes a long way in making them feel better. One of the ways to do this is to summarize the person’s comment and reflect it. Something like, “It sounds like you really have a lot on your plate and have no idea how to deal with all of it, is that?” should do the trick.

3. Know your limits
You cannot have a solution to everybody’s problem. Neither can you have the ability to pull everyone from whatever situation they are in? In such a situation, you do not need to put yourself under pressure to keep on talking. It is okay to not know how to help certain people sometimes. All you have to do is recommend someone that you think would be able to help them pull through. “You really have me worried now and I want to make sure you have all the support that you need the moment. Please, consider contacting any of the organizations that can help” is usually a very useful thing to say when you don’t know what direction to keep the conversation going or when you feel the depth of the conversation is too much for you, or when the person is suicidal. Remember, it’s okay if you don’t know how to help the person. Just make sure you get the person help elsewhere.

4. Say short words of encouragement
Letting someone know that they are not alone in what they are going through and you care for them will go a long in making them feel better. Telling them that you have heard what they have said and that you have them in your heart can be a magic worker sometimes.

Also, try to build a context around the comment you’re making, so the person feels more assured of what you’re saying and why you are saying it. “Sending you big hugs. You’re stronger than you know and I know you’ll get through this.” is enough to warm a person’s heart and get them to be more confident about themselves.
We hope you find these tips very useful in your conversations with people who are walking on a rail.

In case, you have more suggestions that could be of help, feel free to share them in the comment section for other readers to read and learn.

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